So, I went to my first concert since having a baby. I went to see a Tina Turner rendition in Charleston. Let me first state that I have never been big into Tina Turner (I'm sorry fans! but hear me out!....) but in hearing her story, it did something to me. Like, it triggered something about her life story...

I went with my MIL, who is a HUGE fan. In fact, she made me sit down and watch "What's Love Got to Do With It" (a great movie featuring Angela Bassett). It showed the entanglement of stardom, love, lust, loss, abuse, romantic relationships, family trauma, spirituality, and friendships. I was instantly hooked. I had heard of the film before, and had heard that Tina Turner had a "rough life" and managed to overcome it. She even had anxiety..but that was about it. Because she ultimately rose to stardom, it's like everything else that seemed harsh or difficult and insurmountable seemed to fade away. Fame. Fortune. So what's the problem, right?...
Well..
To me, that's a lot like postpartum and anxiety. .
I'm going to list just a few the things that we "magically" make it through as mothers...
Perinatal stress
Changes in relationships as we go through pregnancy
Changes in friendships that we go through during pregnancy
Having to figure out financial changes once a baby comes
Having to plan PTO to go to ultrasounds
Scheduling nap breaks while pregnant
Scheduling pee breaks while pregnant
Having to worry about people wanting to touch you while pregnant
Having to worry about your physical safety while merely walking around while pregnant
Sleeping
Carpal Tunnel
UTI's
Gestational Hypertension
Preeclampsia
Watching what you eat, and still being hungry
Seat Belts while pregnant
Going up a size in shoe
Avoiding the scale
Crying at anything
Screaming at anything
Craving sex
Hating sex
Hurting during sex
Weird dreams
Having to "roll" out of bed
Taking prenatal vitamins
Not fitting into your old clothes the same
Having to find new mom-friends during postpartum
Worrying about your child being treated well by family members
Worrying about how your job will treat you after having a child during postpartum
Postpartum blues
The endless worry
Diaper blowouts
Fussy Colic
HFM (if you don't know what it is...God bless you, may you never have to...)
Not having enough data on your phones for all the pics of baby
Introducing baby to people you don't care for them to know
Having been exposed with your vagina out to every nurse or doctor that was in the room for birth
C-Section recovery
Nipple Soreness
Lactating through clothes
Lactating through sheets
Swaddling wars
Having the mom brain and forgetting appointments
Being afraid to drive with the baby in the car
Being more afraid of germs than you ever have been before
Missing who you used to be
Being afraid of your trauma "seeping" into your child
Being afraid of your child inheriting the "worst" parts of you
Looking at your body for the first time after the "deflation" postpartum
And that's only 50 hurdles. But what I've learned from women like Tina, and many other great women, is the concept of perseverance.
Consider this when getting over anxiety and starting over after postpartum...
Perseverance is the ability to continue striving toward a goal despite obstacles, setbacks, or challenges. It’s about maintaining determination and resilience in the face of adversity. And getting over your anxiety. Here’s why cultivating perseverance is vital for mental health:
Growth Mindset: Embracing challenges as opportunities for growth rather than as threats.
Long-Term Vision: Focusing on the bigger picture helps us stay motivated, even during tough times.
Resilience: Building emotional strength to bounce back from failures and disappointments.
Tina did Just that!
Here's some things to consider about self care, worry, anxiety, and postpartum....
Being Kind to Ourselves: Steps to Improve Self-Esteem and Willpower for Anxiety
Practice Self-Compassion:
Treat yourself as you would a really good friend. Replace self-criticism with understanding and support.
Acknowledge that everyone makes mistakes; it’s part of being human.
Set Realistic Goals:
Break larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Celebrate small victories to boost confidence.
Avoid perfectionism by focusing on progress rather than an unattainable ideal.
Challenge Negative Self-Talk:
Identify negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations.
Keep a gratitude journal to highlight your strengths and achievements. Sometimes this looks like a little notebook next to your bed
Embrace Mistakes to decrease Anxiety:
View mistakes as learning opportunities rather than failures. Reflect on what you can learn from them.
Share your experiences with others to normalize imperfection and foster connection. That's what I'm doing here. I'm not perfect. If what I've gone through can help one other mom or woman, then I've done something right.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People:
Build a network of friends, family, or support groups who encourage and uplift you.
Distance yourself from toxic relationships that drain your energy or confidence. It doesn't have to be a blow-out or show-down. When they've ghosted you, simple fade to black as well.
Engage in Self-Care:
Prioritize activities that nurture your physical and emotional well-being, such as exercise, meditation, or hobbies.
Ensure you get adequate rest and nutrition to maintain energy and mood.
Take Small Risks to ease Anxiety:
Step outside your comfort zone gradually. Start with small challenges that feel manageable
Each small success will build your confidence and willpower for larger endeavors.
Reflect on Your Journey:
Regularly assess your progress and celebrate how far you’ve come.
Use journaling or reflection to recognize your growth and reinforce a positive self-image.
My point today... don't let anxiety, fear, worry of the unknown and concern for imperfection keep you from making those big, wonderful strides. We are going to have rough days...but just like Tina says..."Keep it rollin..."
-Cheers
Cre
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